One of the great blights suffered by modern people is a lack of self-esteem or healthy sense of self. It leads some new students to ask if taking on the suffering of others in tonglen practice might cause them to lose confidence in themselves. Quite the opposite is true. The attitude we cultivate as bodhisattvas — of longing to offer the best of everything to others and willingly accept all loss, unpleasantness or difficulty — actually bolsters our confidence and completely eradicates a lack of self-esteem.
Dzongsar Khyentse Rinpoche
from the book Not for Happiness: A Guide to the So-Called Preliminary Practices
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Further quotes from the book Not for Happiness:
- Intention to benefit all sentient beings
- Wishing happiness for those who have hurt you
- Filtered perception
- Being able to start practicing right away
- Sources of our inspiration
- Rip that ego apart
- Relative and absolute truth
- It’s all a matter of motivation
- The decision to follow a spiritual path
- Three higher trainings
- Opposite direction to dharma
- No substitute for being guided by a guru
- Maintaining a strong grip on the habits
- Merely the product of your own perception
- Dharma is not a therapy
- Our fundamental problem
- Sadness
- Mara’s five arrows
- Nothing genuinely works in samsara
- Mind-made illusions